In the past 6 months, I have met an incredible number of single moms through my blog. Some have blogs of their own, and others just were seeking advice for their own single mom experiences. In no way do I pretend to be an expert on all things about being a single parent, but I offer the one thing that many of their friends cannot – someone to listen to them that’s experiencing the same thing. It’s rare to meet other single parents – for numerous reasons. I have 2 friends of my own that are single parents and I’m incredibly blessed to have them. But the women that I have connected with are so special and dear to my heart – I love them all so much. So when I asked a couple of them to share how they spent Thanksgiving for this post, I was pleased that so many of them willingly reached out with their stories.
Here are 7 stories from single moms sharing how they spent Thanksgiving this year…hope you enjoy it!
Single Mom #1 – Cassie is a single mom of 2 kids – Bobbie and Tina. She is recently divorced, and the kids have just started to go to her ex-husband’s house every other weekend. Based on the agreed holiday schedule per their custody agreement, her ex-husband gets the kids for Thanksgiving this year. She’s completely bummed out – its the first major holiday since the divorce and she will be alone. She tries to reason with her ex-husband to allow her to keep her kids for the holiday, but he refuses. He wants to spend time with them too! Although she’s happy that he’s still involved in the kids’ lives, she’s still depressed about the impending holiday. Since the divorce and fully embracing single parenthood, she hasn’t been as connected with her married friends nor her single friends. Her family lives about 6 hours away, and even if she were to make the drive, she didn’t want to leave the state while her children were with their father. So what does she do for Thanksgiving?? She spends Thanksgiving at a restaurant, all alone…then makes her way home to watch some movies and relax.
Single Mom #2 – Trisha lives with her mom, well more appropriately, her mom live with her. Troy, her child’s father, skipped out of the picture when her now infant son Michael was still in the womb. Trisha had been making a number of moves toward being a self-sufficient single mom, but once Michael was born, she realized that she cannot and could not do it on her own. So she asked her mom to move in to share some of the expenses, care for her infant son Michael during the day and just all around support her through the transition of single parenthood. How does Trisha spend Thanksgiving? Around the people that she loves most – her son and her mother. They cooked dinner together, and ate while watching Michael sleep in his rocker.
Single Mom #3 – Dominique has been a single mom for over 13 years. She has tried her hand at relationships several times during those 13 years, but each time they failed, and each time she walked away with a new child to raise on her own. But don’t get it twisted – Dominique is not looking for pity, empathy, or anything really. She has no time to feel sorry for herself – not when she has 4 children to feed and clothe. Her family disowned her after she became pregnant with her oldest, Kyle, when she was only 13 years old. And she has only a handful of friends…if she’s not with her kids, she’s at work. So what does she do for Thanksgiving? She cooks up a feast for her family, and her friends come by to join in the festivities. They have the time of their lives, talking and laughing all night.
Single Mom #4 – Sherrie has quite a large family on her mother’s side…she has 6 uncles and aunts, 25 cousins, and 30 second cousins. They were a close-knit family – everyone lived about 30 minutes away. About a year ago, she left everything and everyone behind and moved out of state with her boyfriend, Carl. She was so excited for the change, but missed her family so much. So she was incredibly happy when she found out that she was pregnant. She would be able to start her own family now with her own traditions. But Carl wasn’t as excited as Sherrie. It seems that Carl had already started a family, but with someone else – and now she was also pregnant with his child. So what does Sherrie do for Thanksgiving? She spends the days before Thanksgiving moving back home, and Thanksgiving Day back with her close-knit family.
Single Mom #5 – Margaret always knew that she wanted to be married and have children since she was a young child. Really, she wanted the classic family – husband, 2 1/2 kids, house with picket fence – she wanted it all. But at 44, she had still yet to meet the man of her dreams. She has several degrees under her belt, a successful career, and had the house of her dreams. But she didn’t have what she wanted most – a husband and kids. She felt that her biological clock was ticking so she made the only choice that seemed right to her. She decided to pursue a sperm bank for a sperm donor. She tried continuously to conceive, with no success. When she was finally ready to give up, she found out great news – she was pregnant! Her daughter, Bianca, is now 6 years old and the light of Margaret’s life. What did Margaret do for Thanksgiving? She spent the day showering her beautiful daughter with love and affection. They worked together side by side in the kitchen, cooking Thanksgiving dinner and baking numerous pies – more food than the two of them could ever eat on their own. They even made it out to a friends house to share in all the goodies.
Single Mom #6 – Farrah has had her share of loss – her parents died in a car accident when she was a young child and she was practically raised by her sister, who was only a few years older than her. Her sister was her rock. As they grew older, they only became closer, and they were so proud that their own kids were just as a close as they were. About 2 years ago, Farrah’s sister lost her long time battle with breast cancer and Farrah took her nephew in. And just a few short months ago, Farrah’s husband died of a sudden heart attack. Farrah is now a single mom to her nephew and her own 3 kids. So what did Farrah do for Thanksgiving? You could find her and all of her kids (nephew included) at the local soup kitchen. She wanted to teach her children that although they have lost so much, they have each other and to recognize that they should all be grateful for what they do have as others have it much worse. It was the best way for them to spend Thanksgiving – helping others.
Single Mom #7 – Ashley has been a single mom since she got pregnant with her daughter, Gabrielle. You see, Gabrielle’s father Rayshawn has been incarcerated for practically Gabrielle’s entire life, for one reason or another. Ashley has raised her daughter on her own, and has done an incredible job. And now, Gabrielle has graduated high school and settled on a college of her dreams, about 4 hours away from home. Although Ashley is saddened by Gabrielle heading off to college, she is so proud of her daughter’s many accomplishments despite not having her father around. The empty nest, although lonely, is just perfect for Ashley. So what is Ashley doing for Thanksgiving? Her daughter is home for the long weekend, and they have been catching up. They’ve been cooking together, watching their favorite shows, and spending that quality time together. It’s definitely a great Thanksgiving for them both.
BONUS: Single Mom #8 – Natasha has been a single mom for the majority of her son, Micah’s life. It took a while for her to adapt and embrace being a single mom, but now she’s incredibly satisfied with her life. Although her and her son’s father are barely speaking despite the close proximity of their residences, she does not hold any animosity towards him for being a single mom. She has learned to let go and forgive, and accept what life has brought her. She has an amazing support system in her close friends who are like family to her and her son, and her family offers support in any way they can although they are a distance away. So what did Natasha do for Thanksgiving? She spent it with her amazing friends. She provided some money towards the Thanksgiving meal, and her friend did all the cooking. Natasha and Micah spent about 8 hours at their houses, feasting, laughing, talking, and just truly enjoying the time with their family.